Musings

dining7
Bedroom #9
clock & basket
My Tree
living room #9

Mornings – July 24, 2000 -

I know the day has arrived before I actually awaken as the light comes filtering through my eyelids. As I prefer sleeping, where I am kept active through my many dreams, I reach over to get my Zorro Mask, as David fondly calls it, and place it around my distraught hair falling asleep once again. This is when I have my best dreams - the sleep that comes after morning light has peered through our mostly open jalousies. This usually occurs somewhere between 5 and 6:30. Now that I drink less my sleeping habits have greatly improved and I am getting far more rest. Alcohol is definitely the enemy of serenity and rest, a fact that takes me a quarter of a century to recognize.

The dreams that I have during the early morning are always full of action. I see and do things that would never happen to me in my awakened state. I would look pretty funny zipping around the parking lot as if I had a jet on my back like Superwoman. My dreams are usually in color and are constantly in a state of change. I know that they have hidden meanings and enjoy analyzing their definitions even in this somnolent state. However, analysis interferes with the dream state so I normally turn loose of this process in order that the dreams can continue unfettered.

When I finally decide to get up it can only be the result of several occurrences. Either the phone awakens me (seldom) or David has placed my normal pot of green tea, along with his perfectly disgusting cup of Folgers next to me in bed on the bamboo tray that Karen gave me for Christmas several years ago. Karen and her husband Chris bought BVI Yacht Sales, where David used to work as a yacht broker, several years ago. She wanted to give me something to remember her by, a fact that apparently shows in her selection of a morning tray, an item needed and much appreciated.

If David is still asleep when I shed my mask, I think about getting up. I usually do a real power stretch while still horizontal before sweeping my legs over the side of the bed into a vertical position. Going to the loo is normally my 1st priority along with brushing my teeth. Now that my teeth are turning yellow I am seriously considering putting off that chore until after I have had my tea, which I assume is partially responsible for producing this nausuating effect.

We have a winding iron staircase leading from the small hall outside of our second floor bedroom down to the combination living/kitchen area. My ankles normally feel sore when descending but thoughts of this quickly escape to the back of my brain as the greeting of the Caribbean Sea sparkling in the eternally sunny morning fills the entire condo with light - kind of a dusty perfect "its time to get up now" light.

We have an attached porch that serves as our dining room beyond the sliding glass doors that enclose the living area so the ceiling to the porch helps to diffuse the light somewhat - otherwise it would look like noon. Also the sun usually rises far to my left, which of course is east, when descending the staircase and is blocked by the condo wall that separates #9, my soul number, from # 10 next door where Jon and Stephanie live.

My first action upon arrival at the bottom of the stairs is to open the front door just to my left. I enjoy this even more than looking at the sea as there is a magnificent large leafy green tree that beacons me good morning as I take my first breaths. This scene is totally green as I have spent the past four years in this landlocked site growing every sort of indigenous plant from cuttings that I have found either in the yards of friends or along the roadside.

Green is a color that I enjoy only in nature. I genuinely don't like any kind of manmade green with the exception of forest green - the hue that I have chosen as an accent color for the shams and bedskirt on our bed, as well as the towels and the shower curtain (which is mixed in a paisley design with muted golds, burgundies and royal blues). Forest green is restful. All other greens offend me as they are not directly from nature.

With Mother Earth pouring in from the north and Sister Sea from the south I turn on the gas under my already filled kettle. I have found that preparations made the evening before greatly enhance my morning mood. Activity is not my normal awakening state and I try to do as little as possible. The next hours are spent in solitary pursuits - answering e-mail, making phone calls, getting ahead on soon due articles and light household activities.

Morning belong to me and I capture each and every one of them.

DEPARTURE

I suppose that I should be getting ready to go – to depart this life and leave all of my idealist/wonderful/worldly events behind. How does one do this? How does one actually categorize one’s life – what to keep – what to eliminate? Having lived a richly extravagant life I have no idea as to what is the most meaningful, etc. I say etc. because I have been led, in all kinds of spiritual happenings, to picture, in my mind, my most favorite events and places. Each and every time my mind’s eye zooms in on nature and never a person, place or thing.

Having cruised to exotic, as well as non exotic places, and having traveled the rest of the Western Hemisphere (plus Europe, Australia, New Zealand, South Pacific, etc.) by air, train and bus, it never occurred to me to think of these as the best happenings in my life. Having been blessed with many wonderful loves, it still never occurred to me to have these experiences listed as the best. I love my sons, their wives and my grandchildren and my relationships with them have been among the best in my life. The same is true of Bud and David - how blessed I have been to spend so many good years with these men. And I have always loved nature as well – full, wonderful blues (sea & sky), thousands of shades of green (land & plants), palms swaying, ripples in the water and patterns in the clouds - these are the best that life has to offer. I also love rain and grey days, violent storms and the rainbows that appear when the sun returns. Waterfalls are amongst my favorite as well as wildflowers, snorkeling with fish and lounging in my hammock.

These are the things that I will miss upon departure. So not knowing when this final event will occurr, I best make the most of each day, each love and the abundance of nature surrounding me. I am forever grateful for my blessings in this life and for what I have learned through the choices I have made.

So here is to a life well lived and enjoyed - may the next phase be equally as enjoyable.
Mahalo to the Universe ~~~